The Burger Chronicles #5 – Five Guys

Five Guys 1
Bacon Cheeseburger

It ain’t gonna win any beauty pageants but Five Guys’ Bacon Cheeseburger will kick your taste buds square in the nuts. It almost seems to dissolve in your mouth, as conversations simply end and fries are ignored completely ’til the job’s done. It’s a dirty, gooey (and quick) job but someone’s got to do it.

Founded in Virginia in 1986, Five Guys straddles the line between takeaway sleaze and more upmarket-burger fare. Each burger contains two never-frozen, prime beef patties and potatoes are sourced from local farmers. But the end result’s sloppier and trashier than the kind of gourmet burgers you’d eat with a steak knife, a slice of pickle and some hot mustard.

In true Supersize fashion, Five Guys offers customers a choice of 15 free toppings as – from lettuce to jalapeño peppers. I inadvertently ordered mine “All the Way,” which means mayo, mustard, ketchup, lettuce, pickles, tomatoes, grilled onions and grilled mushrooms.

The resulting burger’s dripping with the kind of tasty, OTT American-style goodness you know’s really bad for you. But for ten minutes or so, you couldn’t give a damn…



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